Getting a New Home for your New Blended Family

September 4, 2011 – It is a little known fact that up to 67% of stepfamilies (blended families) do not make it past the first five years of marriage and more often than not end in divorce. Blending families is very difficult for everyone in stepfamilies/blended families, and sadly, most couples are not really prepared for this when they decide to remarry. It takes a great deal more than just good intentions to make blending step families work. You need to take a lot of effort and be blessed with an unusual amount of patience and understanding to successfully blend a family. However, it can be done, and there are things that you can do that can help make the transition easier.

One of the best pieces of advice for any couple who is planning to get married and take on blending families with children is – relocate. The “new” family will need to live somewhere together and for most couples the obvious choices would be either his or her house. However, moving to an entirely new house can prevent so many difficulties it is well worth the hassle of trying to find a new house. The new changes in the family unit can be very stressful and even frightening for a child. The feeling of being an “outsider” in a “different” family’s house can increase these feeling of insecurity.

And it is not much better for a child who gets to stay in his own home. With all the new people in the house, there will undoubtedly be feelings territorialism that can show itself in even the meekest of children. Sometimes this feeling is justified, as new step siblings won’t know the ‘rules’ of the house and are bound to get into trouble, get into things that they didn’t know they weren’t supposed to and ruin special “landmarks” in the home. This can make a child feel very insecure, because his space is being invaded, and it can be even worse if he has to share his bedroom with a new stepsibling. Even parents who have spent many years living alone can have these feelings of territorialism, because they have had things their own way for so long.

All these difficulties can easily be avoided by simply moving into a new house. Even though it can be stressful to move, at least it is something that the whole family can participate in together and look forward to. No one should feel invaded or like and outsider, because the new home is new territory. A new home can be a symbol of a fresh start for stepfamilies/blended families, and it can be a place where they can create new memories and family traditions together.

 

 

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